The bucket is full

It was a long day. I see it in the way you come out of the school, I hear it in the way you speak, and I see it in the way you look around the group. You sigh, the afternoon is getting long. Without addressing anyone, you walk to 'your' place within the group. A place where you can play in peace, where you only have to think about one thing and where you can be undisturbed. I know I'm asking a lot of you when I tell you to drink. I don't see you, you play behind the dividing wall in the group, but I can feel everything that you don't want anything anymore. You are up for today. Yet you do what I ask of you. You walk, no, stroll into the busy part of the group. There is noise everywhere, loud or soft and then someone bumps into you. Your bucket is starting to overflow and there is nothing you can do. Then, as the pinnacle, loud music blares through the speaker. And then it's enough. You explode.

Overstimulation is something that is very common, but almost unrecognized. Or maybe even acknowledged. Children have to constantly adapt. Adjust to the fast pace in the morning when parents have to rush to be on time. Adapt to school where the work pace is also very high. Adapt to all the expectations of the different adults they see in a day. Then it is not surprising that the bucket is full and that all accumulated emotions, tensions, information must be removed. How that works out is different for every child. But the most common are fits of anger and crying.

You stormed into the hallway and threw blocks. I see you and I let you go. Raise it. Get rid of what's bothering you. I know that relieved. You begin to calm down, the music has stopped and you return to the group. The first thing you hear is that you have to clear the blocks. You don't want this, you're not out of your mood yet. You go back to your safe place within the group. After a while I'll ask you if we can clean it up together. You agree to this.

There was a time when I felt uncomfortable when a child was in such a mood. I immediately ducked over to comfort it. I've learned that's not the best. You have to let them go. It is part of the child and it must learn to deal with it. Recognize the emotions, move through them and talk about them.

Actually, I let you do most of the work, but luckily you don't realize that. I'm asking you how the kids in class were today. Whether you were bothered by the noise she made. I ask you if your mind was so busy thinking again. And whether you are disappointed that there are so many children at the out-of-school care today. You looked at me and your gaze is on my retina. Yes, I understand you. And then you let me in and I gave me a glimpse into your head.

I know what it's like to be severely overstimulated. I know how much stress you can experience when there seems to be little to stress about. I know what it's like to have such a very busy and chaotic head. I know how tired you can get just by being somewhere.